drop by drop

 10 12 12

i want that name to mean nothing to me anymore. i want to be able to look at it, and feel nothing. i look at it now and a spark runs down my spine, just like every time we touched. and we are both hurt, i know we are both lost.

but lost, is something i have always been.

 now the tears that drop from my eyes are warm. they aren’t the bitter ones, that burn your throat as you cry. they arent the ones that are sour, and salty. they aren’t the ones that are full of pain. they are numb, like me. its funny how tears reflect your emotions.

they are pain leaving the body, drop by drop, and for me, i feel a tad bit less condensed and suffocated in thought. 

the words on my computer screen arent distorted from the tears anymore,as they have cleared. and im hungry. and food may just be the only thing motivating me to move.